By Simon Travaglia
The pretty-much-complete Bastard Operator sequence from 1995-2003
Painstakingly hand crafted through the unique writer.
Low fats and gluten loose to your convenience.
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Additional info for Bastard operator from hell
No again. We do what we do because we ENJOY it. ” ”Oh! I suppose you’re right” ”I KNOW I’m right. And if I’m not, I’m STILL right, because I’m the *OPERATOR*. It’s that simple! If you remember that phrase, there’s nothing you can’t do. Now the last question. ” ”No no Agent Starling. That is a mere bagatelle. That is simply the method. We want to know the result. What we do is BREAK them. What’s the point of deleting their files if they never use them? What’s the point in reading someone’s private correspondence if you’re not going to let the user know you did it, then tell their friends or parents?
Ignoring his panting, I continue to talk, harping on about our requirement for complance with currently emerging standards till he takes the ball and runs with it. ”Ah well, you see, we’re THE foremost company in compliant systems” (turd) ”In fact, our projected market share is.... ” I let him dig his hole nice and deep. He’s sure that 2 years at University has prepared him for the hardball arena of BIG $ales. ”Yes” I cut in ”But all this is irrelevant without a Dynamically Allocated Heap and some Transient Intuitive Hardware System.
Ok” I say ”I’m just going to ask you some simple questions to guage your knowledge of Computing and Networking in relation to the Operations Field” ”Sure” ”Right. Question One. ” ”Delete all their files, Change their password to ‘Knobhead’ and Erase any backups of their account” ”Excellent. ” ”Uh. It’s a list of usernames/topics/news items etc that you wish the news- reader to automatically skip so you don’t have to wade through rubbish” ”Uh No. Remember I said pertaining to Operations. ” ”Oh.